Time was running down for both of us. We both wanted a family. If we had both been loving, we could have had an ideal relationship, but as she later said, she only had enough love for her children.

Where did you read in what she did? I raised the children when young. I kept the house clean. She had said that what was idea was having child care until the children were old enough to be interesting. I didn't know she meant it. I raised the kids when they were young, giving her the weekends though we both worked 5 days. When they reached about 8 she got interested and took over, basically forcing me out of the parenting role as much as possible. She wanted a House Elf.

There is no adequate in an honest relationship. You don't keep score. Her love was obviously gone... when she decided her children were enough. As for the bell curve, she and I shared our intellectual positions. unfortunately I far surpassed her in being loving, but then I was foolish enough to think all people wanted love.

Reading what you say and how you interpreted what I wrote, I feel sorry for you. You seem to be in a dark place with little hope or positive view.